


The Fire That Burns

by Leviose



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-11
Updated: 2017-02-11
Packaged: 2018-09-23 13:32:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9659516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leviose/pseuds/Leviose
Summary: What does Hinata really feel about Kageyama being invited to the National Youth Training Camp, and not him?





	

“Where are you going, onee-chan?”

“I’m going out for a run! Be right back!” Hinata called back. 

He hit the pavement running. Right here, right now, his feet pounding on the concrete, he felt alive. For the first time ever since he’d found out that Kageyama had been chosen for the National Youth Intensive Training Camp, he felt like himself.

Sure, it was amazing that Kageyama was going for the National Youth Intensive Training Camp. Because Kageyama was a genius. If anyone on Karasuno deserved to go, it was definitely Kageyama.

Hinata remembered it vaguely. After Takeda-sensei had announced it, everyone had seemed to go into shock.

And then Takeda-sensei’s other, shocking but less shocking announcement. That had been another sledgehammer blow to Hinata’s already weakened confidence.

A chance to play for Japan! What could be better?

He couldn’t be happier for Kageyama. The guy was practically his best friend, although he’d never admit it. 

A drop of sweat fell into his eye. The saltiness stung.

Gaining an extra burst of energy, Hinata increased his speed. Oh, who was he kidding? Deep down inside, he felt terrible.

Why hadn’t he been chosen?

Sure, he wasn’t as good as Kageyama. Hinata knew that he didn’t deserve it. But more than anything, he wanted to be chosen.

Hinata squeezed his eyes shut tightly, trying to fade the burn. Ever since he could remember, he’d wanted to play for Japan. For his country, his homeland.

His mind screamed, Who the hell do you think you are? Idiot! You still have 10000 years to go before you can even think about it!

Not for the first time, he asked Why? 

Why couldn’t he have been born with natural genius like Kageyama? It wasn’t like he didn’t deserve it. Hinata knew he worked harder than anyone else on the team, even Kageyama.

Urgh, Kageyama. The setter was what made him, made their team so good. Hinata hated to admit it, but without Kageyama, he wouldn’t even be playing.

Hinata wasn’t anything special. The only thing thing that set him apart was his unquestioning trust in Kageyama, and anyone could do that, really. It killed him inside to admit it, but he was just another speck of dust.

The chance to play for Japan, dammit. To be able to play with, against the best of the best. To be able to keep playing volleyball.

“Damn it!” he screamed out into the night air. Who cared if he woke up some people? It wasn’t every day that he melted down like this.

“Hey, dumbass! Shut up!”

Hinata screeched to an abrupt halt. 

“Kageyama? What are you doing here?” he asked, blinking. With one hand, he pushed his sweaty hair out of his eyes.

“Practicing, dumbass.” Kageyama indicated a faraway court. “Come on.” The black-haired boy quickened his pace, cutting an impressive figure in the moonlight.

Hinata stared at Kageyama’s receding back. He was nowhere near Kageyama yet, or Ushijima, or even the Little Giant. He wasn’t born with the natural genius Kageyama possessed. And a ton of other obstacles stood in his way.

He made a fist. Why the hell was he acting this way? 

Get over yourself, Shouyo! You think you have the right to beat yourself up for being you? You think you can give up? You think you have nothing?

What he had was his determination. Whatever it took, the bitter pills he would have to swallow, even if he broke, he would reach the top. The fire of it would burn up everything that stood in his way.

And he would be the one standing at the top.

Someday.


End file.
